chickens

I'm sorry to say that I had no time for answering your questions yesterday. I was much to busy assisting my local Jedi Council with their annual Respect for Chickens Day event.

Naturally, all Jedi have a great respect for all living things, including chickens. Every year, my local J.C. helps promote awareness of all the many ways chicken can be served: barbecued chicken, fried chicken, chicken noodle soup, chicken and rice, chicken nuggets, etc. This year's winner was an especially good Teriyaki chicken.

I apologize for not warning you in advance; the Force was not with me and it slipped my mind. For future reference, this event is held every May the Fourth. Be with you next week for a proper update.

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Before we get rolling, I'd like to make a quick note that despite some stability issues, the About page has been restored. The layout is still shifting once or twice a day, but things should settle down soon.

Now then, on to your questions:

Dear Cheese^2,

I'm having difficulty making friends. I moved to a small town for student teaching and it turns out that I am neither like my spring chicken students nor like the older than mold teachers! How do I connect?

--Middle of Nowhere

Dear Middle,

Age is really just a matter of perspective. Try and strike up a conversation about something older than dirt (far older than mold) and see if you can find some common ground. Better still, if you can find someone who is older than dirt to hold this conversation near, your chances may be much better. And definitely, don't try this around the chickens.

~Kevin

Dear Cheese-Master

I'm not good at making time for things. My work is falling behind and my social life is suffering... Can you recommend a good time-machine dealership? I can't afford any of the big names.

Short on Time and Cash

Dear Shorty

Start putting money aside now. Preferably somewhere that it will collect interest. If you can save up enough cash at any future point in your lifetime, you can have your time-machine tonight! Just bring it back to yourself once you've bought it.

A word of caution: Be sure to set an appointment of when and where to expect your future self to arrive. Destructive paradoxes frequently result from time travelers interrupting and changing their own past actions. If you are expected, you won't actually change anything.

~Kevin

Dear Kevin,

How cann I graft_t my ownn-.... my own....-... my own pine-- pine-- pine pine pine

+++query-terminated+++

Sorry folks... it looks like something in that last question tripped a breaker here at the SRoC...

Join us again next week for more advice, and more stability improvements.

~Kevin

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